My Cervical Screening Test


You know what I'm talking about. It's that thing that you've been putting off. I've been putting it off getting a cervical smear test for over a year, I'd never had one and in my mind, cervical cancer is never happen to me, so what's the point? Turns out, cervical screening isn't just for cancer. It checks for abnormal cells on the cervix and that's pretty handy to know stuff, right?

To be honest, I've been noticing some things that aren't quite normal and I've been putting it off getting a test because who wants to actually face their problems?! Well that changed today.
I bit the bullet, booked the appointment, she drew the curtain as I took off my pants and it really isn't that scary. I feel like I've accomplished something and it's a proper adult thing to do. I have taken a big step into adulthood! It should really be called the "ultimate adult test" (Can we make this a thing?)
So, for anyone hesitant or wondering what it's like, I'm going to tell you. Cus, let be honest ladies, the unknown and vaginas are things we can worry about. I worry a lot so if I can put any sort of worrying to rest, it's usually a big help and it will be for you too.


image from animalplanet.com
You are told to put your ankles together and legs apart. The nurse is not someone to be nervous about. Keeping in mind she does this for a living! My nurse was really nice and didn't make me feel awkward or anything. It's important to remember that your vagina isn't going to be any different from anyone else's and she's seen them all. The most important thing is to relax. This way it wont be too uncomfortable. Keep breathing and try and focus on something else. I was looking at the different shapes on the ceiling and taking deep breaths as she put the speculum in. That's the thing that opens up the cervix. This is the worst part, I heard a click, then another click and then another as she just kept stretching it. Makes you think how stretchy us women can be! Like, we can pretty much squeeze a watermelon sized human out of our bodies!

Anyway, back to the test, so this bit can be sore, especially if you're not relaxed. Then she puts the swab in to collect the smear. That bit is like two seconds. I could feel that, but it wasn't sore. She also gave me an STI swab too, which is now another thing I can tick off my list (look at me being a responsible-ish adult) And then it was done! It is probably, all together, a minute (that's what it felt like) seconds worth of discomfort.
The tray where she placed all the stuff was right next to me, so I could see it. I noticed there was blood all over everything. "What the fuck?!" Was my initial reaction. It was like something from a horror film. That proper freaked me out. I felt sick. But the nurse assured me that it was normal. When they do the smear, they are actually scraping cells. Sounds horrible, but it doesn't feel like scraping. So the test has the same sort of effect as if you've scraped your knee or something. I googled it as soon as I got a chance too and all results were saying that blood was really common.
So if that happens to you, don't panic!!!
The nurse tidied up, drew the curtain for me to put my knickers and jeans back on and then I was free to go.
I have to wait 4 weeks for any results but just the fact that I FINALLY went is a huge tick of the list and a weight off my shoulders!

We are so lucky to have the service for our cervix (Thank you NHS) and we need to make sure we are healthy down there. Let's be honest, the test could potentially save your life.